Click on advertisements on this page, support my site :-)
___ This crazy chick figured out all the accounts I was stalking her with. What a psycho!!
____ The economy is so bad I just heard a guy ask a lady if she would like to go out for dinner OR a movie?
____ Uno gross face. (Just dusting up on my Spanish.)
____ The easiest way for me to tell if a woman is really listening to me is if she rolls her eyes.
____ Some stupid girl just called me immature which is ridiculous...because I'm 21 and a half.
____ I tried grilling a chicken at lunch time. "Ok, I'll ask you one more time. Why did you cross the road?"
____ My marriage is very successful because my spouse is a figment of my imagination.
____ I'm a firm believer in punctuality. So, what's wrong with showing up at the funeral home before my ex is dead?
____ Took a random unmarked pill I found on the floor because times are tough and no matter what happens it'll make for a good Status.
____ I just found a giant booger under the desk. I will love him, and hug him, and squeeze him, and I will call him George.
____ Iron Man is a superhero. Iron Woman is a command.
____ I bet this status is not gonna make it to the blog.
____ Today I had some ice cream without sprinkles. Diets are brutal.
____ So proud of myself. Even though I didn't make it to the gym earlier today, I got my ass up off the couch and changed the channel.
____ is having a screw driver...minus the orange juice.
____ I'm glad you like my post. I just hope you don't try to comment and ruin it.
____ If you ever buy a toilette in which the manufacture states you can flush up to 15 golf balls without clogging it up, don't ever try it. That's all I am sayin'
____ I would switch cell-phone providers if one had an "unsend my drunk text" option.
___ This crazy chick figured out all the accounts I was stalking her with. What a psycho!!
____ The economy is so bad I just heard a guy ask a lady if she would like to go out for dinner OR a movie?
____ Uno gross face. (Just dusting up on my Spanish.)
____ The easiest way for me to tell if a woman is really listening to me is if she rolls her eyes.
____ Some stupid girl just called me immature which is ridiculous...because I'm 21 and a half.
____ I tried grilling a chicken at lunch time. "Ok, I'll ask you one more time. Why did you cross the road?"
____ My marriage is very successful because my spouse is a figment of my imagination.
____ I'm a firm believer in punctuality. So, what's wrong with showing up at the funeral home before my ex is dead?
____ Took a random unmarked pill I found on the floor because times are tough and no matter what happens it'll make for a good Status.
____ I just found a giant booger under the desk. I will love him, and hug him, and squeeze him, and I will call him George.
____ Iron Man is a superhero. Iron Woman is a command.
____ I bet this status is not gonna make it to the blog.
____ Today I had some ice cream without sprinkles. Diets are brutal.
____ So proud of myself. Even though I didn't make it to the gym earlier today, I got my ass up off the couch and changed the channel.
____ is having a screw driver...minus the orange juice.
____ I'm glad you like my post. I just hope you don't try to comment and ruin it.
____ If you ever buy a toilette in which the manufacture states you can flush up to 15 golf balls without clogging it up, don't ever try it. That's all I am sayin'
____ I would switch cell-phone providers if one had an "unsend my drunk text" option.
